Living off a woman

I met this guy a few years ago. I was in-between relationships and he was tall, dark and handsome. He drove an old Mercedes and well, he called it Vintage and said how much he loved old cars. A date or two later, the guy had to go to Mombasa for biashara. While there, he called and said he needed airtime and couldn’t spot a safaricom shop so i sent him a thousand bob. Next day when he was driving back, he asked me for Kshs 20,000 saying he had an emergency of sorts and couldn’t spot an ATM,said he would pay me when he got back to Nairobi. I never give a man money but i told him i would, just to get him off the phone. 5 hours later, the guy is still calling and asking me for the money. I have never driven to Mombasa, i prefer flying, but surely there has to be one ATM on that road, right?

I may be many things, but Stupid is most definitely not one of them. Did I look like a Barclaycard to him? ”I will pay you back when i get back to Nairobi”,Nigga, don’t you have parents? I have met all kinds of men and I can smell a fake miles away. I have met the man who was so rich he bought me a Passat as if he were buying me shoes. The one who was so broke he made me buy popcorn when we watched a movie. The one who lied so much I don’t even know his last name, the one who disclosed so much that I knew his father had a mistress within the first hour. The man who was so religious that he thought he was god. I have met them all and to think that this man thought he would feed me some lies sprinkled with game? I have lived in this big city all my life and Mr, i am not 13 years old.

Ladies, here are a few pointers to help you spot these men

  • He does Biashara – What sort of biashara? does he sell cars, he is a house broker, is he an illegal smuggler? Biashara is not saying anything, if he can’t tell you exactly what he does, walk!!
  • He asks you for money – I don’t care how broke a guy is, he should never ask a woman for money, unless he is married to the woman. When  a real man wants money, he goes to the bank or to his father .
  • He doesn’t take you to his house – Women, unless he is married, he has no business doing the nasty in your bed. Whats wrong with his house? a friend of mine dated this guy who claimed to live in Riverside but had a proper story of why they couldn’t go to his place, each time. Kumbe the guy lives in Ngara in someones SQ…. see his place first
  • He brags about how much money he has – Rich men NEVER talk about their money and if this man thinks you will date him or like him more because fo his money, he considers you a possession and will never respect you. And take it from me, this is a poor insecure man.

Shame to the men living off women. You are worse than a murderer you stupid thief. May you get shot, may you get hit by a citihoppa, may you fall off a cliff, may you be raped by a shark and eaten by it. You will never amount to anything, May you die poor. You little cunt!!




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