I had lunch with a friend of mine on Saturday. This blog has made people think that i am some relationship Auntie and they feel the need to fungua roho with me. I don’t mind much, gives me something to write about. But some girls have drama, lord!! This girl lives with a man who cheats on her, beats on her and makes her pay half the rent. He was the perfect gentleman when they met. Then 6 months into it, he stopped calling or picking up her calls, he was suddenly busy all day and all weekend, had plans with the boys all the time, had other friends to see. She insisted on loving the man and went and got herself knocked up, then moved in with him. Its been 3 years and he has never introduced her to his folks, not named her son after his lineage. The man has not done anything to remotely suggest that he wants my friend in his life but she stays. Rubbish.
Yes, i said it, that’s utter rubbish. I am sick of worthless women playing victim. No one forces a woman to stay in an unhealthy relationship. If one is that unhappy, they can up and go. Two options, suck it up like a grown woman and live with it or leave. Freaking leave. Don’t bore the rest of us with your pitiful self-inflicted pain. Christ!! This applies to my girl friends and the rest of us walking around like the world owes us a freaking favor. We go around blaming everyone but ourselves for shit, the truth is, we are the ones who choose to take it and we blame other people so that we don’t seem foolish. We play out scenarios and cut out parts to suit our egos and make us seem like the victims.
I understand that indeed, some of us are victims of circumstances. Like when we are treated unfairly and taken advantage of when we young and naïve. I know that there are situations where we can truly say we didn’t know better. However, when we are older, more mature and we know the damned difference, there is simply no excuse. Stupidity isn’t a cleaver disguise or a plausible means towards leniency.
You are foolish if you insist on staying with a man who; Cheats.Is abusive ; Physically and emotionally.Is a narcissist, wouldn’t care if you lived or died as long as he can still gerrit and you can show him off to your friends because he is rich and hot. You are foolish if you stay a married man’s mistress for years on end because you are content with sticking around and playing the part of someone else’s cold leftover dinner. You are dumb as fuck if you fall for this ‘friends with benefits’ crap. Making your pussy someones walk in closet. You are foolish if you stay with a man who dictates all the terms of the relationship to suit his little mind so that he can continue seeing other people and has the okay to come over only when its convenient for them, which never is for you.
In the end, you make your choices. You choose to be there. So what does that make you? stop reading now because this shit is about to hurt. If you take crap, you are stupid, desperate, gutless, absurdly asinine, and worthy of all the bad treatment you are getting. You are not worth of pity or a humanitarian award. If anything, you deserve what you are getting and then some. You have no one to blame but yourself. You are the fool. You are the one with egg on her face. You are the one who will lose everything before you get to know what its like to have it all.
I wonder, are you that empty inside that you will insist on loving a man who will never give you anything because he believes that you are not good enough? If so then you are hopeless. There is nothing anyone can do or say to make you realize that you are of your own wrong doing. You are your own maker of misery and your life will forever remain a phantom in the shadow of what you once envisioned of yourself.
So to my Saturday lunch date, spare me your self-pity. Its your fault when you settle for the piddly scraps you have chosen, not his, not mine, not your friends. I don’t care about your problems. You are sad and dick whipped, brain less and too spineless to realize the truth. This may seem cruel, even a bit morose for me to judge my kind for being obtuse idiots, but we must call it as it is. People who settle for what they get deserve everything they get and I’ll be damned if I have to sit through another lunch and hand out heartfelt regards to little girls who only deserve to be called out for being irrelevant frivolous fools.
I’ll be damned.